Tag Archive: South Park


Hot 20-something ex Cincinnati Bengals cheerleader plus a 17-year-old student mixed with a plethora of sexual advances= dream scenario being taken advantage of. Apparently.

Former Cincinnati Bengals cheerleader and Kentucky high school teacher Sarah Jones pleaded guilty to reduced sexual misconduct charges related to the 27-year-old’s sexual relationship with a former student.

Today, Jones, not for the first time it would appear, opened up on the relationship:

“I began a romantic relationship while he was a student and I was in a position of authority,” Jones said in court (via the Associated Press).

To add more spice to the story in 2009, Jones sued TheDirty.com founder Nik Richie for posting a picture of Jones that claimed she had contracted a sexually transmitted disease and was having sex with Bengals players. She was rewarded an $11 million default judgement for defamation.

Each time I hear of a case of a teacher ”taking advantage” of their position of power by initiating a sexual relationship with a student I immediately think of this piece of dialogue from South Park which pretty much sums up the whole issue perfectly:

Kyle: It’s the kindergarten teacher, Ms. Stephenson.
Police Sergeant: The blonde?
Kyle: Yeah.
Policeman #1: Some young boy is having sex with Ms. Stephenson?
Kyle: Yes.
Policeman #1: Nice.
Police Sergeant: Nice.
Kyle: What? No, you don’t understand…
Policeman #1: You sure they’ve had sex?
Kyle: Yeah!
Policeman #2: Has she performed oral sex on him?
Kyle: I think so.
Policeman #2: Nice.
Policeman #1: Nice!
Policeman #2: [whispers] Nicccce.
Police Sergeant: So, wait. What’s the crime?
Policeman #1: The crime is she isn’t doing it with me.
[cops laugh]
Kyle: Hey! He’s totally underage. She’s taking advantage of him!
Police Sergeant: You’re right. We’re sorry. This is serious. We need to track this student down and
[pauses]
Police Sergeant: give him his “Luckiest Boy in America” medal right away.
[cops laugh heartily]

I can’t say it’s been at the top of my ”to see” list, in fact I don’t think it’s ever really entered my thoughts but I’m certainly not adverse to some skipping in slow motion.

The video features a girl from the Pure Storm modelling agency in London and a fitting tune by Irish singer Van Morrison.

In the test the guys from photography-factory are using a Vision Research Phantom HD slow motion camera shooting to a 120 gig ram stack at 1000frames per second, the lens was a 35mm Carl Zeiss Planar T* wide open.

At the end of the video it reminded me of the South Park episode where they test the boys’ class to see their level of sex addiction and they are asked ”what colour was the handkerchief in the nice ladies hand?” to which they some respond ”what handkerchief?”

If you ask ”what skipping rope” you’ve been paying attention a little too intently.